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Remembering Aki


If you read this journal, even if I don't speak to you often, post a memory of me.

It can be anything you want. It can be good or bad, just so long as it happened. Then post this on your journal.

Be surprised and see what people remember about you. ♥

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Stepping Forward

I have been away far too long. I could barely keep up with the pace anymore. There are friends I've made, and missed. There are groups I've joined, and missed as well.

I miss everybody so much, but each day is a whirlwind that sweeps me away the moment I open my eyes. By the time it deposits me back into my room, I could barely keep my eyes open. How the heck could I write with that kind of situation?

I miss my fandoms - SenRu, and Gundam Wing, of course. I miss my friends, so a loud holler to you guys over there. :)

What have I done, anyway? Could I possibly blame my life? I think not. I have been very blessed these past few months. My days were equally sprinkled with challenges and favors, victories and failures. I have received, and given in turn. I have joined active groups wherein which I could dedicate my spare time to.

Finally, I have taken that one big step towards the fulfillment of my destiny.

Yesterday, I passed my application to the State University. I shall be going back to school for my post graduate studies, and I will take up Comparative Literature, to heck with everybody else. I will allow no disapproving frown, nor biting remark to sway me towards another more 'practical' and 'realistic' path.

This is the path I chose to take. I will walk on it, walk forward, no matter how thorny it is. People keep telling me that I live in a different dimension - a place where dragons fly at will, where love is lost and found and lost again, where princesses don battle armors, and princes get saved by damsels in shining battle gears. My world is a different world, but it is the world I choose to live in. Pardon for neglecting the numbers, the sales, and your 'real life'.

This is my world.

And I'm going to thrive in it, once and for all.
I've never been one to talk or write about my life, so it would be alright to say that I'm as lousy a blogger as I am a speaker. Which is kind of ironic because I have lots of things to say, and I desperately wanted people to listen. I can't talk. The things I want to say, I write. And sometimes, I don't write all that well. I don't even live that well.

But still I try. One day at a time. One word after the other.

I've been trudging far too long, without ever noticing that one very important season is fast approaching. Before I knew it, it's Christmas day, and I didn't even have the chance to actually feel the spirit. So caught up I have been with my life, and with the things I wanted to do, that I forgot this very important season.

I forgot how it feels to actually be excited. I forgot how good it feels to decorate a Christmas tree, or to wrap gifts, or to just share so much love and care to everybody.

And here I was, thinking that I was ready to take that one step forward to share myself to those in need.

Anyway, it's Christmas day, and I've handed out my gifts to my friends and family. I've shared what love and warmth I could share, and sent my prayers to all those who need it. I realized that it's never too late to celebrate Christmas. It's always /there/. Not in the gifts, not in the actual preparation, and not in the tree. It's in the heart.

So, Merry Christmas to you all. I hope you had fun. :)

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Broken Warriors Over A Fallen Kingdom

  Somehow, I see myself and my friends as broken warriors desperately trying to rebuild our fallen kingdom. I keep trying to awaken the ML, and consequently, the fandom, even though I know nobody'd answer me, anymore. I keep trying to kick things into running even though I know the screws have rusted beyond repair.

  Why do I keep doing this? Don't I get tired at all? When would I ever move on?

  I've fought and lost so many battles in my life. I've hit rock bottom, but I still claw my way back up. I do the same here in our own fandom. You guys would ask me to just give it all up and quit. You guys would tell me to just let it go. Let SenRu go. Because Slam Dunk is not as popular anymore, and people have moved on.

  You'd think the silence would have made me get the hint.

  But I still keep on trying.

  We still keep on trying, Archangel and Kim and I.

  Meltwater is the solid evidence of that struggle.

 
 


I broke free...

A couple of days ago, I finally broke free from the chains of my fears.

A couple of days ago, I finally took that one great leap.

This isn't really about winning. I mean, come on. Odds are 99.9% against me. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be able to win.

But then again, humans are born with hope eternal. Maybe that .1% is worth holding on to.


Hopes of winning aside, I think this is, more importantly, about finally taking that one step forward. True, there are legions of better writers out there, but I refuse to back down this time. I couldn't allow myself to cower within my cave forever, spouting word after word, weaving tale after tale, without doing anything.

I have something to say. I want people to listen.

I won't be scared of the bigger voices anymore. I won't be scared of the better people, anymore.

This isn't so much about succeeding as it is about finally trying.

At this first try, I might not make it. Now if I have to try a hundred times and lose a hundred times, I'd do it

But I would still keep on trying.

Because that one hundred and first try might be the one where I make it.

And true..It is the journey that matters.

I am proud because I've finally taken the first step.

I thank my God for that one mighty push.


Alright. It's been a crazy week, but I'm here anyway, with a new set of sentence-snippets. I'll probably rant about my week tomorrow, because I felt as if I've made a big leap from the land of obscurity into the battle-field, so I'm damn proud of myself.

I'm not proud of the fact that I still can't finish my 1=2 fic, though. *waaah*. Thank heavens for sentence snippets.

Title: Preventer-ness Part 1
Author: Aki Midori
Pairing: Heero Yuy and Duo Maxwell
Warnings: slight angst, shonen ai if you squint ^^
Rating: PG
diSClaiMErs: They're not mine, thank you.
Notes: Sorry, guys. Commodore Wilkins shall not make an appearance in this one. It's an entirely new set. Still, I hope you'll like it!


x-posted. sorry if it turns up like crazy. ^^

And it's newbie-ness all over again... ^^

I've been looking over AkiKaenia for so long, that I forgot how it felt like to be a newbie. I've been a [mod] / [admin] for so long, I almost forgot how it feels like to be a new immigrant in a foreign land. ^__^

It's a bittersweet-slash-poignant moment, you know, to be on the receiving end of an [admin] post, for a change. No, I'm not being a retard, and no, I'm not happy that I've been somewhat apprehended (I'm not a complete idiot), but it still feels different to be the one actually receiving it, than the one dishing it out. It just goes to show that no matter how long we are in some fandoms, we /still/ commit some mistakes, wherein which, hopefully, everybody would learn from.

I guess I'm a new-bie all over again. ^__^ Learning new things, meeting new people, making some mistakes (which hopefully won't be repeated). All that new-bie stuff.

I remember how I was when I first started out in AkiKaenia... I was an overzealous 'lil brat, kyaaah! And now I'm one of the mentors of the fandom, and it's an honor I'm not about to take for granted. *GEAR UP, GANG!!! Just you wait I'm going to kick your asses awake in time for RuSen Day!*

Joining a new fandom now, I can't help but smile and think, 'Hey, it's like I'm starting all over again'.

Ah, fandoms. ^__^;;; Can't live without 'em.

Anyway, bounce bounce bounce back up! Don't be ooopid no more, Aki!

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Another batch!

It seems as if they're all I can ever accomplish. Every time I get frustrated over the other things I try to write, I result to writing one-sentences. Because they're fun. And relaxing. And they don't squeeze my brains 'till it bleeds.

*paws*


Title: Domesticity II: The Console and the Flu
Author: Aki Midori
Pairing: Heero Yuy and Duo Maxwell with their pet Commodore Wilkins
Warnings: Utter stupidity brewed by yours truly. Forgive me. Shounen-ai
Rating: PG
dIsCLaiMerS: The characters mentioned in this madness aren't mine. Commodore Wilkins, though, will be up for grabs, as soon as somebody is brave enough to adopt him.
Notes: Because I can't go forward with my RL novel, and my pending 1=2 fics. I need to relax. ^.^ I hope you like it!



x-posted. sorry if it pops out one too many times. >.<

Ze post-birthday post + Fandom Love!

Kyaaaah!

Busy busy birthday. Had to meet up with five clients today, and had to deal with my young aunt's constant declaration of my day. Harhar. Every body would look at me silly before greeting me. I dunno why. Do I look like retard, much?

Thank you to all those who wished me a happy birthday! Tee-hee. You guys certainly made it happy! Special thanks to sharona1x2asia_2misao_duo, ralphiere and juudenkanryou for ze special birthday wishes. link_worshiper too, for the early birthday greetings. ^__^ Hugs to ze friends!





Ok! I gotta go to sleep now. More meetings tomorrow today.

What a fun, fun day I had. The old lady still remains in my mind, but her memory doesn't make me sad, anymore. She makes me want to try harder to be /somebody/, so I'd be able to have the power to help her in my own ways. Maybe I'll find her again next week when we come back, and I'd talk to her then.  Maybe I wouldn't be broke, anymore. Or maybe I'd just want her to know that not all people would just pass her by.


[FIC] And I'm In Love With You

And I'm In Love With You
by Aki Midori

Ridiculously dedicated to the man who first made my heart beat, and break. Just for laughs. Harhar.
Seriously dedicated to my partner in crime, the other half of the Dynamic Duo, Roshee. 'Cause you seriously rock, my friend.
Specially dedicated to Link Worshiper, 'coz I do my job well as your Brita pitcher, and this one's another dose for you. :)

Pairings: Past unrequited 2+3, 1equals2, 3equals4, mention of 6equals5
Warnings: Shounen ai, language, perv!Wu Fei, slight unrequited love angst, sorta-experimental story-telling / narration of the past, AU
Rating: R 'cause /some/ people would make out /some/ time.
dIscLaimErS: I fought long and hard for ownership of Slam Dunk's Rukawa and Sendoh, but lost. I tried to claim GW and ze pilots, but was trampled over by ze law. I ain't fightin' for anybody no more. T.T The song I'll be using in the end is from 'Survivor'.

BlaHs (Because Aki can't live without any!):
Randomly whipped-up stuff because I'm sensing the beginnings of a massive migraine. For my fellow 12 fans, don't mind the initial pairing too much. 'Tis a guilty pleasure o'mine, really, 3x2x3. But the 12 luvin' reigns dominantly over this fangirl's heart! I started this with the idea of it being a mere drabble/ficlet, but it grew heads, and every time I had to slice it off, two more would take its place. Yeah. Mythical monsters on board.

Bunch o' unrequited 2+3 ranting in the beginning, but I sincerely hope it would amuse you.

Hope you enjoy this!


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